Firewalker

Review and discuss Chris's friend' short stories.
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Ortho the Frank
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Firewalker

Postby Ortho the Frank » Tue Apr 16, 2013 7:29 pm

Critiques? Comments? Suggestions? Put them here!
kf6eml
PostsCOLON 213
JoinedCOLON Tue Jul 13, 2010 3:34 am
LocationCOLON Waldron, IN

Re: Firewalker

Postby kf6eml » Thu Apr 18, 2013 6:49 pm

Neat!

Only one grammatical error that I saw:

then frowned at something moving in the forest behind.

ended a sentence with a preposition.
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Ortho the Frank
Site Admin
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Re: Firewalker

Postby Ortho the Frank » Fri Apr 19, 2013 7:09 pm

Corrected, thanks!
kf6eml
PostsCOLON 213
JoinedCOLON Tue Jul 13, 2010 3:34 am
LocationCOLON Waldron, IN

Re: Firewalker

Postby kf6eml » Sat Apr 20, 2013 12:12 am

It's an interesting story. Particularly since I've hiked the area around Kilauea. (Can't get into the crater. They have it pretty effectively fenced-off.)

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